Tuesday, October 31, 2006

4 LSEian found in Oxford!

Must tell you all something interesting. From today onwards, due to daylight-saving, we will have to adjust our clocks one-hour backward. So, instead of being 7-hours behind Singapore time, we will be 8-hours behind Singapore time from now on. And you know what, I actually thanked God for it coz I was supposed to go on a day trip today and had to wake up at 630am. Due to the adjustment, I gained one extra hour of sleep and could leave home when the sky is brighter (so it was safer to walk)!

Before I went on to give details of my trip, I must put in a disclaimer first, especially for my dearest students. ;P Don’t think that your Cindy Dao Shi is always having fun, traveling around.. I took my studies seriously and worked hard on weekdays, so that I could play hard during the weekends! : )

Ok. So this morning, we set off first for the Warwick Castle. It belonged to the family of King Henry VII and is currently owned by Madam Tussauds. Hence there are wax figures exhibited at various parts of the castle.

Our second stop was Stratford and we visited Shakespeare’s birthplace. Hmm.. it was quite a bit of disappointment coz there isn’t really much to see. But I find Stratford a nice little town. It has a population of 30,000 only.

Our final stop is Oxford. Oxford is a college town, like Cambridge. It has a population of around 150,000. It was built around the 1400s and had a total of 39 colleges. 28 of the colleges offered undergraduate subjects. There are around 200 – 700 students in each college and students are supposed to live in his/her college. We visited Christ Church College, the most famous of the Oxford colleges.

I was again a bit disappointed coz we only managed to see a small part of Oxford. By the time our tour of Christ Church College ended, the sun was already setting and hence we had to make our way back to London. There was no chance for us to walk around the town centre and to go punting along the river. Hmm.. think I had to find a chance to come back to Oxford again. : )

For dinner, we went to a Chinese restaurant at Bayswater and had roasted duck again. : P
It had again been a tiring but fun day. And I thank God for giving us good weather and making my weekends in UK interesting. : )

Woo-Hoo! Yummy Duck Rice!

I had so much fun today! : )

Went to St Paul’s Cathedral for Holy Communion service in the afternoon. I know I am a bit naughty to say this, but… the wine (taken during Holy Communion) tasted really nice! :P

After service, we went to the weekend market at Notting Hill Gate. There were so many things to see. And the vegs and fruits were really cheap! I bought a box of strawberries for 50 pence and lettuce for 40p only. : )

Then we made our way to Baywater for the famous duck rice at Four Seasons. On the way, we passed by Boen’s shop! Heeheehee….

And I went into a shoe shop called Office and bought 2 pairs of shoes – a silver pair and a golden pair! : P I know I shouldn’t be spending too much… but but but.. I have a weakness for shoes! I saw these pairs 3 days ago and I have been thinking of them… and and and since I am a size 9, it is soooooooo much easier for me to find fitting shoes in UK than in Singapore (where everyone has small feet, making me feel so embarrassed for having big feet… : ( )! I have London-sized feet! :P

Haha.. But I know Law Ying, Lee Imm and Hui Hsien will say I always buy similar designs. The only difference is in terms of the colour of my shoes. :P You’re right! Shall bring a pair back to Singapore in Dec and show you!

Shopping Spree

Went shopping at Harrods today. Harrods! The ultimate shopping experience! Heehee.. I managed to get a Harrods loyalty card too! :)

Actually, my main purpose was to look for a birthday gift for Jun Lin and also some possible Christmas gifts for family and friends. Things at Harrods aren’t cheap but they are nice! And they are representative of Britain. :)

After shopping, I went to Chinatown for baked pork chop rice – Hong Kong style. Yum Yum. : ) Guess I am still very much a Hong Konger in my taste for food.

On my way home, I bought some chocolate biscuits for Gordon. He has been complaining that he’s unwell and yet very busy with his studies. Want to bring some joy to my dearest little brother. : )

Oh.. but it was a tiring day indeed… and I have burnt a big whole in my pocket coz I had to pay for my Oct and Nov rental today. It costs me 998 pounds in total, including the water and electricity bills for these few months.. Sigh… why must the cost of living in London be sooooooooooooo high????

Monday, October 23, 2006

Position of Power

If one day, God puts you in a position of power and authority, don’t shy away. Take the opportunity by faith, do great things for God and serve others with the power and authority that has been bestowed on you.

This is the message I got from today’s sermon. I am not an ambitious person. I shied away from power and status and fame and what not. It’s thus a reminder that should one day, in God’s grace, I am put in a position of power, I should grab the opportunity to serve God and others through the influence I have and not miss the chance to do greater things for God because of my timidity and laziness. : P

Trip to Cambridge

I went to Cambridge today! Woo-hoo! : )

It was an event organized by the Emmanuel Evangelical Church. We met at Victoria Station at 9am and set off by coach to Cambridge town. It’s a 2-hour drive. Cambridge is a very nice town. On arrival, we had lunch at a local pub. I had huge Fish & Chips for lunch. Yeah! I finally got to try British Fish & Chips!

After lunch, we went on a guided tour to some of the more famous colleges in Cambridge – King’s College and St John’s College. Cambridge started in year 1209 when a group of students from Oxford came down to this part of London, due to a riot between the students and the town people in Oxford, to form a school. In the past, it only accepted male students. Female was not allowed to study. Currently, Cambridge had 31 Colleges and about 17,000 students, with an equal gender ration, except for 3 colleges which accept female students only.

King’s College was founded in year 1441 by King Henry VI, who was very much interested in education and religion. Unfortunately, King Henry VI was killed in a civil war and the construction of King’s was disrupted. After the war, King Henry VII carried on with the work and the building took 100 years in total to complete. At present, there are about 550 students studying in King’s College and there is a huge, magnificent chapel at King’s. St John’s on the other hand, was founded by the mother of King Henry VII. It has beautiful courtyards and vast pastures.

On our way, we also passed by the Trinity College where Isaac Newton was once a student. It is the wealthiest of all the colleges, with an annual income of 20 million pounds!!! An apple tree from Newton’s home town was planted outside the college… but I didn’t see any apples… : P
What is special about Cambridge is that there is a river running across the colleges and the banks of the river are connected by a lot of bridges. There is no walkway along the river and hence, one has to punt along the river. We went punting during our free time and we passed by sites where the movie Harry Porter was filmed and also the Mathematics bridge at Queen’s college. We also had coffee at the town centre. All in all, it has been an enjoyable day!

Coping with Rejection

Today, I went to a medical centre near my house to register for medical services and was again being rejected because they found my proof of address insufficient. They wanted me to show proof of letters/statements that were sent to me at my current address. I felt so frustrated because they did not explain clearly what their requirement was when they rejected me the first time, and I was quite pissed off by the fact that people here can be quite inflexible. I printed the record of my contact address from my HSBC internet account website and also the school records but they still found it insufficient. Sigh… this experience also made me realize that I could not take rejection very well. I knew this is no fault of mine but I still felt like crying when the nurse told me that they could not register me. I must learn to be more thick-skinned…

Anyway, having dealt with the bank, medical centre, telecom company, transport authorities and even the Accommodation Office in school, I find that in comparison, Singapore has a much more transparent and efficient system than in the UK. We should really appreciate what we have at home. : )

A Second Chance

Went with the Christian Union to All Souls Church tonight for a special function: Only One Life. It’s a gathering of all the CUs in London, worshipping the Lord together and encouraging each other to live our Uni years for the Lord.

We were reminded that:
1) We are strengthen by God’s grace;
2) We need to share what we have learnt/heard with others;
3) We will face difficulties/”hardness”;
4) We need to be single-minded in our mission to share the gospel; and
5) We have to persevere because we may not see the fruits of our efforts in the short term.

But what touches me most these evening is a realization that God is given me a second chance to live life as a student and to glorify Him during my Uni days...

My undergraduate days were not exactly the happiest moments in my life. In fact, it was one of the darkest periods in my life, and I seldom share about it. It was the year after mum passed away and also when I decided to break up with my first boyfriend. There were a lot of heartaches, self doubts, feeling of loss and insecurities. I didn’t interact much with people and I studied very hard coz good academic results was all that I have and made me feel secured.

God is gracious. With time, wounds were healed. And I seldom looked back, though sometimes, I do feel a bit regretful that my undergrad days were so uneventful and I never did anything for God. Tonight, it struck me that God has presented me with a chance to be a full-time student again. Am I going to do something for Him this time?

I am excited, but I don’t know how to begin and what I must do. How should I shine for Him? How to be the salt and light? I am shy and I seldom talked to people about God.

I guess, the persons I interact with most are my housemates and I do hope to take care of them and love them as my little sisters. I want to listen to God’s voices in my heart and be a blessing to people around me. I will try!

Dear God, thank you for giving a second chance. I want to live for you. And may you use me in the way you want and make me a blessing to those around me. Amen.

[Afternote: Amazingly, the day after I said the above prayer, I had a chance to share with my housemates some matters relating to Christianity and I found myself so ill-prepared for that! :) Having been in a Chinese Church for 27 years, I had difficulty expressing Christian concepts in English! Haahaa.. I am determined to work harder in this area!]

Monday, October 16, 2006

What a Fruitful Day!

I have fun today! : )

In the morning, I went Canada Water with Kenneth. I heard that it was a scenic place, but it had left me down. There was actually nothing much to see.. then we walked across Southwark Park towards Tower Bridge. I have been to Tower Bridge a year ago. But I still felt excited walking across Tower Bridge again. After that we passed London Tower and had lunch at KFC. Yes, Kentucky Fried Chicken. I actually missed KFC and missed Gordon too, coz he always asked me to go KFC with him on Sun nights. Heehee.. :P

After lunch, we went for service and then met up with May Gee. We explored the National Gallery and Westminster Abbey. We then parted coz May Gee and I had a dinner appointment at our MOF colleague’s house. [Law Ying, this colleague of mine is actually doing a Masters at LBS! : )] (by the way, I walked past HMRC and I told this photo... :P)

What a sumptuous dinner! I haven’t had so much food for a long time. : ) There were char siew, roasted duck and pork, chicken, fish, vegetable, rice, completed with brownie and ice-cream too! Yum Yum Yum! And, they also passed us some chrysanthemum tea packets, medication and toiletries. Wah! I am so happy! Have food to eat. Have more stuff to bring home! Heehee…

On a more serious note, the message I received from God today was: I have experienced God’s provisions and works, but how much do I know of God himself? There is indeed much to give thanks for: from IRAS rejecting my initial application to do a Masters in US [so that I have more time to consider where I really want to go and here I am in UK instead!] to letting a lazy person like me do a Masters degree [you know, I will be put off by all the essays and GMAT/GRE tests I need to do if I am going to US] to actually being here and settling down in a flat that I like… I have known much of God’s “doing” in my life, but how much do I know of God’s “being”? I want a personal relationship with God. I want to know Him truly as a friend; I want to know His likes, dislikes, His desires. Hmm… I will try to listen more to His voices in my heart from today! : )

A Happy Homemaker. : )

Today is Sat. After breakfast (and when my housemates were still sleeping), I began to clean and vacuum my room and then proceeded to clean to whole kitchen and the bathroom. After that, I prepared chicken and sea snail soup for myself and my 3 little housemates. : ) I was actually enjoying myself while I was doing the housework. Heehee.. I want to be a good home-maker!

After lunch, I felt a bit restless. It was a nice sunny day and I didn’t want to waste the day away at home… so I changed and went for a walk alone. I first went to the National Theatre, then strolled along River Thames to reach Oxo Tower. There were a lot of interesting design shops in Oxo Tower. I had fun window-shopping. And then I crossed the Blackfriars Bridge to the other side of River Thames and do some more shopping along Strand.

I have 2 missions in mind: to find a cable for my newly bought printer and to find William’s birthday present. I found an electronics/computer shop and managed to get a suitable cable there. But looking for a gift for William was a much harder task… hai…

Anyway, when I got home, I managed to connect the printer and install the software all by myself. You know, in the past, I used to depend on William and Gordon for all computer-related matters. I pride myself in being a “techno-dummy”. Haahaa.. : p

But I have no excuse now and I have to explore and learn on my own. I am happy that I succeeded. Haahaa.. although these are little things in life but I thank God for letting me grow and improve in all areas of my life! : )

The Woman in Black

I caught my first play in London after I came three weeks ago. It’s a horror/thriller story, about a female ghost who, after her son was tragically killed in an accident, took revenge through killing other people’s young children. It’s something like “The Ring” where the curse was passed on when one heard of her story and saw her ghost.

I never liked horror shows. In fact, I have never seen a horror movie, because I do not want to pay to get myself scared. So, despite the great acting, good visual and sound effects, I would say this play was at best entertaining, but did not leave much of an impression on me. : )

Nevertheless, watching plays and musicals is my hobby and I would very much like to make it a regular event. : ) Will share more with you all in future.

Tomorrow is Sat and I am planning to make it a house-cleaning day. I bought chicken today too so that I can make soup in the afternoon. Three weeks have passed and I thank God that I have settled in well. How are you all in Singapore? Write to me and keep in touch k? : )

Friday, October 13, 2006

Spiritual Comfort Zone

“Jesus is more glorified in diversity than homogeneity”

This is what strikes me at the Christian Union meeting tonight. I went for the LSE Christian Union meeting for the first time.

During my JC and undergrad days, I was apprehensive about joining Christian groups in school. I grew up in a Baptist church setting. I feel a bit awkward interacting with Christians from other denominations. I am very comfortable with my church life in Grace Church…

But coming to London makes me feel like venturing out of my comfort zone, and this time, it is my spiritual comfort zone. I have been attending traditional Chinese Christian churches for the past 27 years. Have I forgotten that people from different cultures, races, denominations, who worship the same True God as I do, are my brothers and sisters in Christ too? We have varying backgrounds but we worship the same God. And it is time for me to learn about the amazing things God has done in other countries too.

So although I will be looking for a Chinese Christian church to root myself in, I think I will attend Christian Union meetings too to grow alongside Christians from different background. And I hope this one year will be a fruitful year in my spiritual journey too!

PS: My hostel room has been taken up on Wed 11 Oct. Thanks for your prayers! I thank God for his provision once again!

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Scenic Route

It was a beautiful day on Mon!

I tried walking to and from school today. It's just a 20-min walk to school and another 20-min walk back. And there is nice scenery along the way..

I walked along Hungerford Bridge (towards Charing Cross) on my way to school…

And I walked across the Waterloo Bridge on my way back…

But it was raining today and I have to carry my laptop to school…sigh… very heavy… internet will only be up in Nov... sigh...

Monday, October 09, 2006

My New Home

Let me show you parts of my new room. This is my desk (Kenneth helped me fix it) and my DIY wardrobe that I fixed all by myself! :)



This is the view outside my room… I like it when the sun shines into my room.. And I have a double bed now. Anyone of you want to come over and stay with me? :)

This is my clothes racks and a cupboard. I realized that the clothes I brought over are in rainbow colours! J

I can walk to school from my new place. And I will pass by Thames River along the way. Will take more photos to show you next time!

I have moved!

I have moved! Bye Bye Sidney Webb House!

But the internet connection at my new place has not been put in place yet. So I would not be able to update my blog and check emails often these coming weeks. Nevertheless, I will still try my best to share with you what I have learnt during this period. :)

On Fri, I was not feeling well. A fever was coming and I quickly popped Panadol Cold, and prayed that I won’t fall sick. Thank God that I feel much better after some rest! On Sat, I managed to arrange for Keith (Wei Shan’s brother) to come and help me drive my stuff to my new place at Waterloo. I have 8 bags of stuff! Didn’t realize that I have bought so many things within the 2 weeks here! Luckily Keith has a car. Thank God for His amazing provision! :)

But when I found that the internet connection was not ready, I was sooooo disappointed. I tried to find alternative solutions desperately but to no avail. I felt very upset because it made me feel so disconnected from my familiar community – you all. I fretted. I threw tantrum and made my loved one feel upset. And then I regretted that I over-reacted.

So today, during Service, God spoke to me. I am His child. I have the Holy Spirit in my heart. Why didn’t I have the peace and calmness in my heart that should flow from His presence in my life? Why should I fret and worry over frivolous things? Why can’t I confront difficulties bravely and in a mature manner? I am reminded that God holds my tomorrow and I should trust and feel safe in His hands. Thank you, Lord, for comforting and reminding me. I will be brave and will learn to take things easy.

I didn’t regret the move coz I like my new room. I bought new furniture and I did up a DIY wardrobe all by myself – 24 wooden planks and 48 nails in total. I am so proud of myself. I feel like I am having my own little space. And now that I have my kitchen, I cooked porridge for myself for the past 2 nights. Yum Yum. :)

And it’s even more amazing to find that I am actually “connected” to my housemates in one way or another:
Chermain – she is my junior at RGS and RJ, doing exactly the same subject (S02) and she knows Gordon (my brother).
Wei Lynn – she is Jun Lin (Gordon’s girlfriend)’s primary school classmate
Laura – she is my junior at RJ, and she knew my colleague at MOF.

We have nice chats in the kitchen and I feel much more at home in my new place. I can’t help giving thanks to the Lord for the amazing grace He has prepared for me, without me knowing it. Although I am the oldest in the flat, I don’t really feel that “old” la coz hahaha.. we can still talk about “girlie” stuff. Anyway, I am happy and once again, I think everything is BEAUTIFUL in His time. Praise the Lord!

Saturday, October 07, 2006

A busy week is over.. but I am falling sick...

Yeah! It's Fri, finally. A week of intensive course is finally over. But think I didn't have enough sleep and am feeling a bit unwell... must sleep early tonight.

Tonight is the last night that I am spending at Sidney Webb House. It's mid-autumn festival. I saw the full moon, but no one celebrates it around here. Nonetheless, I invited my current flatmates out for dinner coz I wanted to see them before I leave. Had a good time with them. :) Happy to have met nice people here...

Oh. and I am quite proud of myself today. I went exploring the library and copy shop and was happy that I managed to find my way around. I am happy that I am getting more independent and am not afraid of asking around when in doubt anymore. :)

Got to pack... Bye Bye, Flat 501.5, Sidney Webb!

Friday, October 06, 2006

A lump of furry balls!

Today was rainy and cold. Luckily I have this furry scarf that I could use to keep me warm. It's purple in colour, which matches my new purple coat and pants and pink/purple shoes perfectly. :) Thanks IRAS friends, for the gift!!! :)
I had my favourite cabonara spagetti (though microwave version) and strawberry smoothies for dinner tonight. :)

Today, I fretted over whether I should move out of my Hall this Sat. You see, the Accommodation Office still have not found a replacement and I will have to pay 2 sets of rent for a while... Even though the Accommodation Office said there is likely to be replacement, I am still worried... I guess, this is another training and I have to learn to depend on God. I am a person who prefers certainty, proper planning and precise execution of plans. I need to learn to take steps of faith, to take risks and to cope with unknowns...

But I do hope a replacement can be found soon so that I don't have to pay double rents indefinitely... Brothers and sisters, pls pray for me le. Thanks!

Thursday, October 05, 2006

Shd I take on a Challenge?

Was out for class from 9am to 7pm today.. tired.. :)

hmm... I am deciding between taking a course in Elements of Taxation or one in Taxation of Corporate Transactions. The Elements of Taxation course will be easier to me, since I have been doing tax work for the past few years, and I guess though I will learn more about the UK system and Capital Gains Tax from this course, the benefit of this course to me will not be as great as the course on Taxation of Corporate Transactions.

On the other hand, though I am interested in Taxation of Corporate Transactions, I am afraid I do not have the required legal training and background to handle the demands of the course. I was praying silently during class for wisdom from God to decide which course I should take...

And then some thoughts came to my mind. I have travelled so far to pursue a degree in a subject that I like, I should make the most out of it. Taking up Taxation of Corporate Transactions means I will have to spend more time reading up and doing research but I will learn much more from these topics that I know little about. I should have the courage to step out of my comfort zone and do something new. Although I may not be able to score well in this subject, I am sure I will get to learn something in the process of taking up this challenge... ok. So Taxation of Corporate Transactions it shall be!

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Tiring day...




Today I have class from 10am to 7pm. No time for lunch due to some clashes in time table. Ate 2 tiny pieces of bread and drank a cup of chocolate.

Too tired to cook after class so I got super unhealthy food of fried chicken, fries and ribs for dinner. :) After dinner, I quickly went to the computer room in my hostel to print out the lecture notes. It's difficult printing stuff here (and in school). You got to first deposit some credits into your printing account. Then looked for a printer where you can log on to send the print job to the printer. Then you logged on at the printer terminal to start printing... I wanna get my own printer after I moved....

This is for Lee Imm: I have been carrying my pencil box around with me! :)

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

I am a student again!

Today is the beginning of term. I have lessons from 9am to 6pm. My schedule for this week will be something like this everyday.. tired.. Came back, cooked instant noodles and did some packing.. :)

Oh! I encountered another train delay this morning. It is the 2nd time in 1 week. I got to wait 20 min for train and then the first train that came was so crowded that I had to wait for another one. Luckily I managed to squeeze into the next train and reached school on time. :)

Hmm... now I really appreciate the transport system in HK and Singapore and I am looking forward to moving to my new place, where I can walk to school and forget about train delays!

Monday, October 02, 2006

I am moving!

Wanted to pen down some of my thoughts before I forgot... :)

When I decided to come over to UK, I have one objective in mind: to grow closer to God and learn to depend on Him. Being alone in a foreign land means I have no one to turn to, and I have to depend on God. I am not sure how this training will turn out, but I have faith that if I trust in Him and follow His guidance every step of the way, I will grow into a woman after God's heart.

Many of you would have known that I was quite disappointed when I knew that I will be staying at the Sidney Webb House (a hostel that is pretty far from school). I wanted so much to stay at Grosvenor House, which is closer to school and also has a mini kitchen where I can cook! I like to cook! I don't understand why God puts me here.. it's so tiring travelling to and fro school everyday and i don't feel safe ...

But I began to appreciate God's work. You see, I have been pretty independent since 17, when God took mum away. :) Taking care of myself, preparing meals for myself etc are not so much of a problem for me. I guess, if I were to stay in Grosvenor House, it is pretty much the same as I would have been in Singapore... this is not so much of a learning process..

However, staying at a hostel further away allows me to explore a lesser known part of London and appreciate God's protection and provision. It also allows me to meet new people (in the common kitchen) and do more regular exercises (walking to the train station and changing from one tube line to another tube line.) And I begin to ponder over what is God's purpose of putting me here? To be the light and salt to my flatmates?

But I would still like to keep my options open and try looking at alternatives, since God has miraculously opened the way for me 3 days ago (see earlier posting on searching for a new home)...

So, I have the chance to "flat view" for the first time in my life. :) I went to Waterloo to take a look at the empty room that my friend has and I fell in love with the room the moment I stepped into it. It is more brightly lit than my current room and more airy too. The washroom is bigger, the kitchen is well-maintained and there is this cosy feeling about the whole place. My housemates seem friendly - 3 Singaporean girls. Waterloo is also much closer to school and there are shops around the station. And it is where I can take the Eurostar to France and also trains to other parts of UK!

I decided to move to Waterloo without much thoughts. I guess, this is the work of your prayers for me. I have this peace in my heart and also joy and excitement of moving into a new place, having a new beginning, knowing that God is walking with me. It may have been God's plan to put me in Sidney Webb first, so that I may move to Waterloo? This I may never know but I know I will feel too comfy to move out of my comfort zone have I been placed into Grosvenor.

Whatever it is, I know that I have to be a good testimony for God and live out a Godly life, wherever I may be. I pray that I can get along with my flatmates and be bold to share with them about God's love for me and for them. I pray that I will be sensitive to God's voices and will learn to continue to walk with Him every step of the way. :)

Just a little sharing. Planning to move on Sat. Will upload pictures of my new room then. :)

Sunday, October 01, 2006

It's a Bright and Sunny Day.. with occasional shower of course.. and i skipped class...

I skipped class for the first time in my life. That's really coz the refresher course today is on calculus and statistics, which is not relevant to the subjects that I will be taking. So at last, I got a day to tour around London! Hurray! :)

I thank God for a nice sunny day (thought this is London and hence, there will be showers during the day). It makes everything look a bit brighter and more cheerful. And my new purple coat comes in handy. Hurray Hurray!



We first went to Trafalgar Square. It's beautiful.. When I came last year, it was under renovation so I didn't manage to see how pretty it was..


and it is just opposite the national gallery.

then we went to St James Park, which is near Buckingham Palace and we managed to get a glimpse of the Change of Guards. St James Park is big. And the grass is sooo.. green... I think I have a slight affliation towards green objects, coz I am "Little Green"!

I even took an "artistic shot" :P

After lunch, we went to yet another park - Hype Park which has a beautiful lake.

Then, we went to Harrods. I wanted to buy a can of chocolate chunk cookies.. :) maybe I will bring it back to Singapore.

It has been a sightseeing day indeed and I thank God for it. :)